Wednesday, December 31, 2003

Its the last day of 2003, it was hell of a year till the very last day of it…because I had to cancel my after-school lectures for today, students were either afraid of going out of their homes, or warned by their parents of going out. Many rumors say that today, some suicide bombers are going to ‘celebrate’ the New Year…

From the very 1st moment I woke up at 7:00, hearing nonstop bombing and machine guns shots… I felt that that was another day of the war… the military one…
I went to school… and the school was almost empty… it was such a boring day.

I had this important meeting with the managing board of the Al-Muajaha Paper, we had it at Wassif’s instead of in the office because Wassif (Chief-in-Editor of Al-Muajaha) was shot in his leg a week ago during a pro-Saddam demonstration, and he couldn’t go to the office. Anyways, we draw some important new outlines about Al-Muajaha and it’s policy… and we going to re-start printing issues and doing reports again after this long break that lasted for about 4 months due to lack of funds. Finally, we could get a sort of a stable funding from “un Ponte per” [an Italian NGO… stands for “A Bridge to” in English]… so, starting from next Feb., the Al-Muajaha would hopefully be back on track.

I finished the meeting with the other folks at about 4:00 … and I went back home… I was supposed to be at home before 4:30 but I was home at 5:45, because all roads that led to everywhere were blocked… several big explosions happened, one of them was near Al-Muajaha office and I saw the US hum-vees burned down there… it was a mess.

I was invited to a small party at my aunt’s, but I could not make it because of the roadblock thing. Moreover, we even could not go out to have dinner for the same reason. Anyhow, it is two hours before the New Year now… and instead of chilling out and dancing with my girlfriend in a New Year Party… I am writing this blog, feeling this hatred burning inside me… listening to Paradise Lost shit [which is cool, I might add].

It is the New Year knocking on our doors, while walls are ruined and windows are still broken since the war… It has been 9 months since the terror broke out… and things are still getting worse. It has been almost a year since Saddam was gone…yet, the majority still ‘thinks’ that Saddam was/is better than the US Authorities here. It has been days, days and weeks… promises were given, speeches were made, money was spent, and contracts were signed. But, I’m still living in a country where looters and killers are more free than me… where the very simple basics in life are not available… where civilians get killed because soldiers are not careful handling their weapons… where people are not allowed to show their opinions in public media if they were “inflaming the passions against the coalition forces”… I am not living in the same country I used to live in a year ago … I am not living in the country I hoped it would be… I am not living in the country that I was promised to live in… but nonetheless, thank God... I AM still living.
That is an enough reason to be liberated for, isn’t it?

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