A Family in Baghdad

Sunday, November 19th, 2006
Peace be upon you…
To continue talking about my visit to Baghdad…
Sunday came on; it was the day of Saddam and his assistant's trial, and the issuing of the verdict.
We were busy with the laundry and house chores, and watching the electrical power, whether it was the national company generated, or by our street generator?
When the national electrical power is on, we operate the washing machine, the electrical heater, and the water pump, to lift up the water from the ground storage tank to the upper tank on the roof.
As for me, I have forgotten these things for two years, as I am living in normal conditions outside Iraq, no problems of national electricity, generators, or suffering. But for the poor Iraqis, these are their every-day vocabulary since the nineties, the embargo, and the electricity problems which weren't solved until now.
Usually, when the national electricity power is off, the water supply stops, because all the central pumps stop, and when the general electricity is on, the water supply comes along, so people operate the pumps to lift up the water to the upper tanks…
We used to come and go, to find out what will the verdict be against Saddam?
Then, at last we saw the verdict, and said: wow, things will burn up with fire again.
And sure enough; mortar shells are still falling over Adamiyah, a Sunnie neighborhood accused of supporting Saddam. And there were many demonstrations in various cities, some supporting, and some condemning the verdict.
But the real disaster was the Prime Minister's (Al-Maliqiee) speech, for it was a disgusting, sectarian, anger-provoking speech, for those wise ones who seek to calm things down and pull the country out of its dilemma.
And for some others, the sectarian, narrow minded like him, they found it a great speech.
And still for some others, those who were angry with the other sect, their anger and indignation increased.
The disasters increased when the Iraqi Police opened fire on demonstrators who denounced the verdict against Saddam, while fire wasn't opened on those who supported it…
There was a sub-title on Iraqi TV stations, that some militias were attacking some areas in Baghdad, or attacking people's houses and kidnapping them. It was supposed to be a curfew, how do these militias move around and attack houses?
Where is the government, the Police, and the Army?
We called many friends to ask what is happening in their areas, and each area had its own terror…
Here, there are militias, and there, mortar shells are falling…

At that moment precisely, I saw the fact that this is a losing sectarian government which pours oil over fire, increasing the blaze in Iraq.
I was amazed at the government's stupidity, and its dumb, backwards political speech. I felt it has revealed to everyone its idiocy and incapability to handle Iraq's problems wisely, and intelligently.
The Prime Minister said in his speech: the execution of Saddam isn't equal to one drop of blood from Al-Sadder the martyr, or Al-Hakeem, or the Al-Da'awa Party martyrs…
This is a catastrophic speech!
This is a speech that can ignite a civil war…
All those whom he mentioned in his speech of Saddam's victims are only the Shia'ats. This is a speech provoking violence, opening wounds, and strengthening the wish of revenge in the victim's kin.
As if he is saying: Saddam is a Sunnie, and his victims were all Shia'ats. Now, we avenged them.
If he had one iota of brains, an iota of understanding, an iota of patriotism, of love to Iraq and the people of Iraq, he should have said: The execution of Saddam isn't equal to one drop of blood from any Iraqi who was the victim of Saddam's injustice.
That would have been enough.
This would have been a speech of a patriotic man, of the head of a national unity government which really wants to save the country from what it is in.
But he rather proved he is the head of a sectarian, spiteful, disjointed government, with a losing speech, far removed from the pulse of the street, caring nothing for it, caring nothing of the bloodshed, and doesn't want to put an end to it….
I felt sad and disappointed; Iraq is surly walking to a pit, under the rule of these losing leaderships, who didn't realize yet the catastrophe that has befallen Iraq and the Iraqis, this leadership is heedless to the fate of the country and its people, thinking with the brains of an ant, seeing only what is small and limited.
So now the fate of Iraq is in the hands of those vicious who live under the motto: We came for revenge?
I always said, and still say; that Iraq needs leaderships like Nelson Mandela, who establish the culture of forgiveness and forgetting the past, who put the interests of the country before their own, who forget their personal grieves and hatreds, and grow above them, in order for peace to prevail in the country, in order for the Iraqis to reconcile and unite.
As for those fools who are ruling in Iraq now, they are destroying the country and tearing its people apart, whether they know it or not. But in the end they are serving the occupation, presenting to it, on a silver plate, a broken country, a torn-up people, and someone begging the occupation, with all submissiveness and humility: Do not move out!
Of course, why would he move out?
Because if the occupier moves out, then the people will throw them into the garbage; the people do not want such leaders; backwards, sectarians who pushed the country back into the dark ages, who killed its people, robbed its wealth, destroyed its economy, and pushed it into a dark tunnel, carrying it towards an unknown, dark future as well…
Iraq should be led by cultured men and women, nationalists, without sectarian mentalities, only the love of Iraq, its people, and its interest. That should be their urge.
Do they exist?
Yes, Iraq is full with thousands of them, but the government of Bush, and those retard leaderships who came with it do not allow them to appear on the stage, so, they were killed and displaced, so the ugly faces would remain in the forefront.
Who brought on those faces? And who handed them the authority, and made them the decision makers?
The elections and the constitution?
All these were false and illegal, manufactured by the occupier, and now we saw what it has exuded; the destruction, and the bloodshed…
This is not what the Iraqis want. These leaderships aren't our ambition after all the agonies we saw.
These leaderships are worst then Saddam Hussein.
Saddam used to terrorize us with his security institutions, but at least no one kidnapped our sons or our cars, and no one raided the houses of innocent people to kidnap them or spill their blood on the streets without a cause.
The country was secure and safe…
And now?
Destruction, ruin, bloodshed spread, and lying, too!
They say Iraq was liberated, that it has a national-unity government, and its future is shiny, happy, and like honey.
At the time of Saddam there were some who cried for us, and consoled us. Now, they are killing us, destroying the future of our children, and then send false stories about us: that the Iraqi people are building a young democratic country…
Ha,ha,ha…hello…
Where is that young structures?
I see nothing but a destroyed country, and terrified, thwarted people, exhausted by calamities, who are calling for help, and calling, but no one is answering….
As if the whole world has gone deaf…
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At the peak of my sadness and frustration, while I was at my friend's house, Bush appeared on TV in the evening, and said: The world became a better place without Saddam Hussein…
I fell into laughter… I said to my friend: listen, everything is perfect, everything is better than it was, but we- the Iraqis- do not comprehend, and do not appreciate the miracles that Bush brought to Iraq…

***************************
Sunday and Monday passed slowly, boringly, I wished I could go out of the house and walk around in Baghdad, but it was still a curfew because of Saddam's trial, and the bad security conditions.
We read on the subtitles at the Iraqi TV stations that the people of Adamiyah are calling for help from the government, demanding the stopping of the mortar shelling on the neighborhood. The government says it doesn't know the source of the shelling.
People were calling for medical help, and blood donations for the victims…
Two days later, mortar shells landed on Al-Kadimiyah, Al-Sha'ab District, Bad Al-Mua'adam, and on Adamiyah too.
And still the government does nothing…
A week later, while I was in Amman, I saw on one of the Iraqi TV stations, the meeting of the parliament with the Iraqi Defense Minister, and when they asked him about the source of the mortar shells that are landing on residential areas and killing innocent civilians, he said that- speaking militarily, we cannot pinpoint the location precisely, because the shelling could be operated from a pickup track, shooting the target, than moving on. And after a discussion with the parliament he said: we do not have the instruments that can locate the source of firing, but the coalition forces have them…
Well then, asks the poor Iraqi citizen: and what exactly is your job, you and the blessed coalition forces? Didn’t you sit upon the chairs and take over the authority under the pretext of protecting Iraqi civilians?
Where are the protection plans?
What have you done to stop the Iraqi blood flow?
Each of you is throwing the responsibility upon another, blaming him for the failure?
Grief increased in my heart for what is happening to Iraq and its people… my conviction grew that, the conditions of Iraq will never be mended until these deformed shapes are removed from the responsibility positions.
Iraq needs faithful leaders who can achieve security and settlement for the country, and not for a bunch of meek followers, who act according to the occupier's orders, and cannot protect their country, and their people…..
***************

Friday, November 17th, 2006
Peace be upon you…
To finish my talk about my visit to Baghdad…
We went to the restaurant in Al-Mansoor Dist., I found my friend and her children waiting for me. I was happy to see them; they asked me about our news and conditions in Amman. I told them that life there is more secure and settled, but there is no peace for Iraqis while outside their country…
Her children, God bless them, are smart, both boys and girls. The son, who is Majid's age, is in third year medical collage. I asked him about his studies, he said that most times there is no regular school day, but students copy the lectures and study at home.
I remembered when we were in Iraq, at the time of the embargo in the nineties, then the war in 2003, how much the Iraqi children's eyes went sore while they studied by the light of a candle or a kerosene lantern? Years passed until small generators became available for us to start buying them to reduce the damage to our children's eyes.
And with all the difficulties, our children excelled, and went their way successfully.
One of Majid's friends' name is Omar (a Sunnie), and the other's name is Hayder (a Shia'at), they both study at medical collage. And now each of them carries two identity cards in his pocket; one a Sunnie and the other a Shia'at. While they go to collage, the mothers remain terrified all day long, waiting for their sons to return safely.
What kind of a life is this?
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The eldest daughter of my friend achieved a high mark at the high school exams this year, God bless her, and she was admitted to the medical collage. I was so happy for her, and thought to myself: Are there intelligent and patient people like the Iraqis? In spite of all the ordeals they study, excel, and have smiling, laughing faces?
I respect the Iraqis, and I am proud of being one of them. I see them as strong, renitent people, in spite of catastrophes, people who are proud of themselves and their civilization, even though Bush disfigured their image in front of the world, making them look like barbarian tribes who fight among themselves.
The truth is- the role of the intellectuals, the nationalists, and the wise ones in Iraq was deliberately marginalized. The shiny, beautiful picture of the Iraqi people in the media was blotted… and the authority was put into the hands of leaderships that are foreign from the people, that used to live as opposition abroad; those who planned the war on Iraq with Bush, then we discovered that they are worst than Saddam Hussein, as they brought along their militias that kill and terrorize the Iraqis, they turned the land of Iraq into a blood-shedding field, and the occupier watches, and feels happy, because this is exactly what he wants to justify remaining in Iraq for indefinite years.
But I found that the Iraqis understand exactly what is happening. I found no sectarian hatred in their hearts against each other.
I found that Hayder and Omar are friends who loved each other since childhood days, and each fears for the other from being kidnapped by the criminal sectarian death gangs, of which the Iraqis are innocent- innocent from its presence, its notion, and from those who finance it…
I found that Hayder and Omar are a model of the Iraqi young people and their sufferings now…
*******************
We had lunch together; we talked for a long time and laughed a lot, even though I kept watching the restaurant's door from time to time, imagining an armed gang would burst in and shoot us all…
After lunch we had some Iraqi tea, which I haven't tasted for a long time.
At three o'clock my friend said she must leave because she has an afternoon duty at a hospital other than the one in which she works in the morning. I admired this brave spirit of hers, in spite of all conditions, for she works mornings and afternoons to help Iraqi women who suffer a lot of problems in pregnancy and childbirth because of the pollution caused by the war, and the terror of giving birth to a deformed baby, which is something that has become a truth looming in front of every Iraqi pregnant woman, for such cases became a frequent occurrence after the 2003 war.
I said good by with kisses, we all wished the fire of turmoil would die down, that we would go back to Iraq, and be together again.
*****************
My friend from Adamiyah called, said she was in Mansoor and wants to see me. I gave her the name of the restaurant, and she came. We drank tea together, I asked her about the conditions in Adamiyah, she said things were difficult and dangerous, and life moves just barely. I told her I know that completely, my heart goes with you, praying to God to save you, and these difficult days would be over…
She brought a box of sweets with her for me. I was amazed and asked - why? She said- but it is a small thing.
I said to myself: how sweet natured the Iraqis are? Even in times of stress they do not forget courtesy and warmhearted behaviors.
But later, all my friends who came to greet me, each brought a gift with her; a t-shirt, a bed shirt, or some sweets.
They surprised me, and filled my heart with happiness and certainty that these people could never be defeated, or give up their identity…
I said to myself: Iraq should be ruled by good people like his people, and not by a bunch of gangs who know no mercy…
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I said goodbye to my friend from Adamiyah with kisses and good wishes, that the fire of distress would die down, that Iraq would settle down, and we should all be together once more.
Then we went to the house of a friend of mine in Al-Dawoodi.
The lady of the house is an old woman, a retired school headmistress, living with her are her sons, their wives and children. I love them very much; I see them as a model of the good Iraqi family. They presented to us tea and Kleecha (Iraqi pastries filled with dates). We talked a lot, we cried and laughed…time passed quickly, and suddenly they told me: Um Raid, you must leave now, darkness fell, and the streets are dangerous…
We kissed and said goodbye…
I went out quickly with my relative to drive me to my friend's house in Dragh District, Al-Mansoor. I didn't realize the seriousness of the situation until we reached the 14 of Ramadan Street a few minutes later, for I found the street dark and deserted; no cars, no shops, and no pedestrians. My heart shook with fear when I saw a checkpoint, is it real, or false?
What time is it?
I put my hand forward, and with difficulty saw it was 5.40 pm.
Oh, my God!
This street was always so full of movement and cars since it was, until a late hour at night, its lights bright, its restaurants open. How did it turn now into a street of terror and ghosts before 6 pm?
We passed quickly, going to my friend's house, for that was a true check point, thank God.
And before her house's entrance there was another checkpoint. They said: there is no entry. We said: we're sorry, we weren't aware we were late. The Iraqi soldier smiled, and said: all right, go on, quickly, and waved us in with his hand.
We entered the district quickly, and knocked on the door. The area was dark for there was no electricity. There was a generator working somewhere, illuminating some houses.
My friend said: Tomorrow there is a curfew, it is the trial of Saddam, and the situation is tense. Adamiyah was bombarded by mortar shells today, since 4 pm…
I was very annoyed. I called my friend in Adamiyah to check their safety, she said –yes, there is a bombardment, but it isn't near our street.
I breathed with relief, but I thought of the poor families on whose houses the shells fell.
My friend prepared dinner with her husband, I was annoyed by the news; tomorrow there is a curfew, the city is tense, the people are afraid, the country is broken and is living in a real ordeal, tomorrow is Saddam's trial, isn't what catastrophes we are going through enough? What is the meaning of timing this trial now while the country is going through a severe crisis; the government is weak, the security is deteriorating, the militias poisoned people's lives- raking havoc and no one stops them, neither the government nor the occupation forces. Everything is collapsed.
The last thing the Iraqis care about now is Saddam's fate, what is the difference if he dies or remains in prison? What would this influence or change from the bitter everyday reality? Will it stop the violence and bloodshed? Will it make the government stronger, and make it acceptable in the eyes of the Iraqis?
I don't know. We kept talking, wondering and grumbling about the absurdity of what's going on… we were all worried about what will happen tomorrow…
Maybe they will sentence him to death, and that will provoke new clashes among people, or between them and the government.
At that moment I felt how mean Bush is, and how cruel is his heart, feeling no mercy, does he want to gain victories for his Party in the Congress elections, at the expense of the miserable Iraqis' souls?
God knows what will happen…
I slept with my heart clenched, afraid of what tomorrow might bring…..
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الجمعة 17 تشرين ثاني 2006
تكملة الحديث عن زيارتي لبغداد

ذهبنا للمطعم في منطقة المنصور..
وجدت صديقتي واولادها ينتظروني , فرحت برؤيتهم , سألوني عن أخبارنا واحوالنا في عمان, قلت لهم الحياة اكثر أمانا واستقرارا , لكن لا راحة للعراقيين وهم خارج وطنهم ...
أولادها أذكياء ما شالله , بنات وبنين
الولد الذي بعمر ماجد ابني هو في كلية الطب , الصف الثالث, سألته عن الدراسة قال معظم الاحيان لا يوجد دوام منتظم, لكن الطلاب يستنسخون المحاضرات ويدرسون في البيوت,
تذكرت عندما كنا في العراق وقت الحصار في التسعينات , ثم الحرب 2003
كم تعبت عيون اولاد العراقيين وهم يدرسون على ضوء الشمعة او الفانوس ؟
مضت سنوات حتى انتشرت المولدات الصغيرة وصرنا نشتريها من اجل ان نخفف الاذى على عيون اطفالنا
ومع كل المصاعب تفوق اولادنا ومضوا في طريقهم بنجاح

اصدقاء ماجد واحد اسمه عمر(سني) وواحد اسمه حيدر (شيعي) , وهما يدرسان في كلية الطب
والان كل واحد منهما يحمل بجيبه هويتين , واحدة سنية وواحدة شيعية ,
وهم ذاهبون للجامعة تظل الامهات مرعوبات طوال النهارينتظرن عودة ابنائهن بالسلامة

أية حياة هذه ؟
************************
البنت الكبرى لصديقتي جلبت معدلا عاليا ماشالله هذه السنة في امتحان الثانوية العامه وطلع لها قبول في كلية الطب
فرحت لهم كثيرا, وفكرت في نفسي : هل ثمة شعب ذكي وصابر مثل العراقيين؟
رغم المحن يدرسون ويتفوقون ووجوههم مبتسمة ضاحكة ؟
أحترم العراقيين وأشعر بالفخر لانني واحدة منهم,
أراهم شعبا قويا صامدا رغم المحن , يعتز بنفسه وحضارته
رغم ان بوش شوه صورتهم امام العالم , وأظهرهم كأنهم قبائل همجية تتقاتل بينها
والحقيقة انه تم عمدا تهميش دور المثقفين والوطنيين والعقلاء في العراق
تم طمس الصورة الجميلة المشرقة للشعب العراقي في وسائل الاعلام ..
ووضعت السلطة بيد قيادات غريبة عن الشعب , كانت تعيش كمعارضة في الخارج , وخططت مع بوش للحرب على العراق
ثم اكتشفنا انهم اسوأ من صدام حسين , حيث جلبوا مليشياتهم التي تقتل وترهب العراقيين , وحولوا ارض العراق الى ساحة لسفك الدماء , والمحتل يتفرج ويفرح لان هذا بالضبط ما يريده حتى يبرر بقاءه في العراق الى سنوات غير محدودة العدد

لكنني وجدت العراقيين يفهمون تماما ما يحدث
لم اجد حقدا طائفيا في قلوبهم ضد بعضهم
وجدت حيدر وعمر أصدقاء يحب بعضهم بعضا منذ ايام الطفولة , ويخاف كل منهم على الاخر ان تخطفه فرق موت طائفية مجرمة , العراقيون بريئون منها ومن فكرها وممن يمولها ...
وجدت حيدر وعمر نموذجا للشباب العراقي ومعاناته الان..
*******************
تناولنا الغداء سوية , تحدثنا طويلا وضحكنا كثيرا , رغم انني كنت اراقب باب المطعم من حين لاخر اتخيل ثمة عصابة مسلحة ستدخل وتطلق الرصاص علينا جميعا..
بعد الغداء شربنا شاي عراقي, منذ فترة طويلة لم اشرب مثله
في الساعة الثالثة قالت صديقتي انها سوف تغادر لان عندها دوام بعد الظهر في مستشفى اخر غيرالذي تعمل به في الصباح
أكبرت فيها هذه الروح الشجاعة, رغم كل الظروف , فهي تعمل صباح مساء من اجل مساعدة النساء العراقيات اللواتي يعانين من مشاكل كثيرة في الحمل والولادة بسبب التلوث الذي سببته الحرب, ورعب الولادات التي تنجب اطفالا مشوهين , صار حقيقة أمام كل أم عراقية حامل, فهذه الحالات صارت ظاهرة مألوفة بعد الحرب 2003
ودعتهم بالقبلات , وتمنينا كلنا ان تنطفي نار الفتن , ونعود للعراق لينجمع شملنا من جديد
*****************
اتصلت صديقتي من الاعظمية وقالت انها في المنصور تريد ان تراني
اعطيتها اسم المطعم وجاءت
شربت معها الشاي, وسألتها عن أحوال الاعظمية, قالت انها صعبة وخطرة والحياة تمضي بشق الانفس, قلت لها اعرف ذلك تماما , قلبي معكم يدعو الله ان يحفظكم وتنتهي هذه الايام العصيبة ..
جلبت لي معها علبة حلويات
تعجبت وقلت لها لماذا ؟
قالت انه شيء بسيط
قلت في نفسي : ما اطيب نفس العراقيين ؟
حتى في المحن لا ينسون المجاملات والتصرفات الحنونه
لكن فيما بعد , كل صديقاتي اللواتي جئن للسلام , كل واحدة جلبت معها هدية , اما تي شيرت او قميص نوم او حلويات
أدهشوني وملأوا قلبي بالسعادة واليقين بأن هذا الشعب لا يمكن ان ينهزم أو يتخلى عن هويته ...
وقلت في نفسي : ينبغي ان يحكم العراق أناس طيبون مثل أهله , وليس حفنة عصابات لا تعرف الرحمة ...
*******************
ودعت صديقتي من الاعظمية بالقبلات والتمنيات ان تهدأ نار الفتن ويستقر العراق
, ونعود لينجمع شملنا من جديد
ذهبنا الى بيت اصدقاء لي في الداوودي
صاحبة البيت امرأة كبيرة السن , مديرة مدرسة متقاعدة , ويسكن معها اولادها وزوجاتهم واطفالهم
احبهم وأراهم مثال العائلة العراقية الطيبة
قدموا لنا الشاي والكليجة ( معجنات بداخلها تمر
تكلمنا كثيرا وبكينا وضحكنا ..
الوقت مر بسرعة , قالوا لي فجأة : ام رائد , لازم تطلعي الان , الظلام جاء, الشوارع خطرة...
تبادلنا القبلات وودعتهم ,

خرجت بسرعة مع قريبي ليوصلني لبيت صديقتي في حي دراغ , المنصور
لم ادرك خطورة الموقف الا حين وصلت شارع 14 رمضان بعد دقائق, وجدته مظلما موحشا لا سيارات ولا محلات ولا مشاة
ارتعش قلبي من الخوف عندما رأيت نقطة سيطرة , هل هي حقيقية أم وهمية؟
كم الساعة؟
مددت يدي وبصعوبة رأيت انها الخامسة و40 دقيقة
يا الهي !
هذا الشارع كان يعج بالحركة والسيارات طوال حياته , حتى ساعة متأخرة من الليل , اضواؤه لامعة والمطاعم مفتوحة , كيف تحول الان الى شارع رعب واشباح قبل السادسة مساء؟
مررنا بسرعة , ومضينا الى بيت صديقتي, كانت نقطة سيطرة حقيقية , الحمد لله
قبل مدخل بيتها كانت نقطة تفتيش اخرى, قالوا ممنوع الدخول , قلنا متأسفين تأخرنا ولا ندري ، ابتسم الجندي العراقي , وقال هيا بسرعة وأشار بيده
دخلنا الحي مسرعين , طرقنا باب البيت, المنطقة مظلمة لا توجد كهرباء, ثمة مولدة تعمل وتضيء بعض البيوت
قالت صديقتي غدا منع تجول , غدا محاكمة صدام , الوضع متوتر, الاعظمية قصفت بالهاون اليوم منذ الساعة 4 عصرا..
انزعجت كثيرا, اتصلت بصديقتي التي في الاعظمية اطمأن عليها , قالت نعم يوجد قصف لكنه ليس قريبا على شارعنا
تنفست الصعداء, لكنني فكرت بالعوائل المسكينة التي سقطت الصواريخ على بيوتهم
أعدت صديقتي العشاء مع زوجها , كنت منزعجة من الاخبار, غدا منع تجول, المدينة متوترة, الناس خائفون, البلد محطم ويعيش محنة حقيقة , غدا محاكمة صدام , الا يكفيهم ما نحن فيه من مصائب؟
ما معنى توقيت هذه المحاكمة والبلاد تمر بأزمة حادة , الحكومة ضعيفة, الامن متدهور, المليشيات سممت حياة الناس, تعيث فسادا ولا احد يوقفها لا الحكومة ولا قوات الاحتلال , كل شيء منهار

أخر شيء يهم العراقيون الان هو مصير صدام , ما يهم لو مات او بقي في السجن؟
ماذا سيؤثر أو يغير من واقع الحياة اليومية المرير؟
هل سيوقف هذا العنف وسفك الدماء؟
هل سيقوي الحكومة ويجعلها مقبولة في عيون العراقيين؟
لا اعرف, بقينا نتكلم ونتساءل ونتذمر من سخافة ما يحدث...
كنا جميعا قلقين مما سيحدث غدا ..
ربما ان حكموا عليه بالاعدام , هذا سيحفز على مصادمات جديدة بين الناس أو بينهم وبين الحكومة

في تلك اللحظة احسست كم هو حقير بوش وكم هو قاس قلبه لا يعرف الرحمة ,
يريد ان يحقق انتصارات لحزبه في انتخابات الكونغرس على حساب أرواح العراقيين البؤساء ؟
الله يعلم ما سيحدث ..
نمت وقلبي مقبوض وخائفة مما سيأتي به الغد.....
****************************



الأحد 19 تشرين ثاني 2006
السلام عليكم
تكملة الحديث عن زيارتي لبغداد

جاء يوم الأحد , وكان يوم محاكمة صدام ومعاونية, وإصدار الحكم
كنا مشغولين بالغسيل والعمل المنزلي , ومراقبة الكهرباء هل هي وطنية ام مولدة؟
عندما تأتي الكهرباء الوطنية نشغل الغسالة والسخان الكهربائي وماطور الماء لرفعه من الخزان الارضي للخزان الذي على السطح
بالنسبة لي فقد نسيت هذه الاشياء منذ سنتين حيث اعيش خارج العراق حياة طبيعية , لا كهرباء وطنية ولا مولدة ولا عذاب
لكن بالنسبة للعراقيين المساكين فهذه مفردات حياتهم منذ التسعينات والحصار ومشاكل الكهرباء التي لم تحل لحد الان
عندما تنقطع كهرباء الوطنية عادة, ينقطع الماء , لان المضخات المركزية كلها تتوقف
وعندما تأتي كهرباء الوطنية يأتي الماء, فيشغل الناس الماطور , المضخة , لرفع الماء للخزانات
العلوية..
وكنا نروح ونجيء لنرى ما هي نتيجة الحكم على صدام؟
ثم رأينا اخيرا القرار , وقلنا : يبو, راح تشتعل الدنيا بالنار من جديد
وفعلا, فقذائف الهاون ما زالت تتساقط على الاعظمية , وهي منطقة سنية عليها تهمة انها تساند صدام
وطلعت مظاهرات في المدن المختلفة بعضها يؤيد وبعضها يندد

لكن الكارثة الحقيقية كانت خطاب المالكي رئيس الوزراء , فقد كان خطابا طائفيا مقززا ومثيرا للغضب , بالنسبة للعقلاء الذين يبحثون عن التهدئة واخراج البلاد من محنتها
والبعض, صغير العقل والطائفي مثله , وجده خطابا عظيما
والبعض الغاضب من الطائفة الاخرى , زاد غضبه وسخطه
وزادت المصائب حين اطلقت الشرطة العراقية النار على متظاهرين ينددون بالحكم على صدام, بينما لم تطلق النار على المؤيدين..
ووجدنا سبتايتل على المحطات العراقية ان مليشيات تهاجم مناطق في بغداد , او تهاجم منازل اناس وتخطفهم , المفروض انه منع تجول , كيف تتجول هذه المليشيات وتهاجم البيوت؟
اين الحكومة والشرطة والجيش؟
واتصلنا بصديقات مختلفات نسأل عن ما يحدث بمناطقهم , كل منطقة لها رعب خاص...
هنا مليشيات وهناك تسقط هاونات ...

في هذه اللحظة بالذات رأيت حقيقة ان هذه حكومة فاشلة طائفية تصب الزيت على النار وتزيد الحريق في العراق
ذهلت من حماقة الحكومة وخطابها السياسي الغبي المتخلف
واحسست أنها قد كشفت للجميع, عجزها وغباءها عن معالجة مشاكل العراق بحكمة وعقل

قال رئيس الحكومة في خطابه : ان اعدام صدام لا يساوي قطرة دم من الشهيد الصدر والحكيم وشهداء حزب الدعوة ..
هذا خطاب كارثي !
هذا خطاب يشعل حربا اهلية
كل الذين ذكرهم من ضحايا صدام هم فقط من الشيعة
هذا خطاب تحريض على العنف وفتح الجروح وتقوية الرغبة بالانتقام عند اهالي الضحايا
كأنه يقول : صدام سني, وكانت ضحاياه كلها شيعية , والان انتقمنا لهم

لو كان عنده ذرة عقل, وذرة فهم , وذرة وطنية وحب للعراق وشعب العراق , كان ينبغي ان يقول : ان اعدام صدام لا يساوي قطرة دم اي عراقي ذهب ضحية ظلمه
هذا يكفي
هذا خطاب رجل وطني لرئيس حكومة وحدة وطنية تريد فعلا انقاذ البلد مما هو فيه
لكنه اثبت انه رئيس حكومة طائفية مفككة حاقدة خطابها فاشل , بعيدة عن نبض الشارع ولا تهتم به, لا تهتم بسفك الدماء, ولا تريد ان تضع له حدا....

احسست بالحزن وخيبة الأمل, العراق يمضي للهاوية بالتأكيد تحت يد هذه القيادات الفاشلة, التي لم تدرك بعد الكارثة التي حلت على العراق والعراقيين, وهذه القيادة مستهترة بمصير البلاد والشعب, لا تفكر سوى بعقل النملة , لا ترى الا ما هو صغير ومحدود
اذن مصير العراق الان بيد هؤلاء الحاقدين الذين يعيشون تحت شعار : جئنا لننتقم؟
اقول دائما, وما زلت : العراق بحاجة لقيادات مثل نلسون مانديلا , يرسخون ثقافة المغفرة ونسيان الماضي , يغلبون مصلحة البلاد على مصالحهم, يتناسون الامهم الشخصية واحقادهم , ويترفعون عليها, من اجل ان يسود السلام في البلاد, من اجل ان يتصالح العراقيون, ويتوحدون

اما هؤلاء الحمقى الذين يحكمون الان في العراق فهم يدمرون البلاد ويمزقون اهلها من حيث يعلمون او لا يعلمون , لكنهم في النهاية, يخدمون المحتل, يقدمون له طبقا من فضة, عليه بلد محطم , وشعب ممزق , ويتوسلون بكل مذلة وخنوع بالمحتل : لا ترحل !
طبعا, لماذا يرحل ؟
لانه ان رحل المحتل, الشعب سيلقي بهم الى القمامة , لا يريد هكذا قادة متخلفين طائفيين ارجعوا البلاد للعصور المظلمة, قتلوا اهلها , نهبوا ثرواتها, دمروا اقتصادها, ودفعوها لتدخل نفقا مظلما
يسير بها نحو مستقبل مجهول مظلم هو الآخر...

العراق ينبغي ان يقوده رجال ونساء مثقفون , وطنيون , لا طائفية عندهم, فقط حب العراق وشعبه ومصلحته , هذا هو هاجسهم
هل هم موجودون؟
نعم , العراق يمتليء بالالاف منهم , لكن حكومة بوش ومن جاء معها من قيادات متخلفة , لا يسمحون بظهور هؤلاء على المسرح , فتم قتلهم وتهجيرهم لتبقى هذه الوجوه القبيحة في الواجهة
هذه الوجوه من جاء بها؟ ومن سلمها السلطة وجعلها صانعة القرار؟
الانتخابات والدستور؟
كلها مزيفة ولا شرعية , صنعها المحتل , الان رأينا ما افرزت لنا من تدمير وسفك دماء...
ليس هذا ما يريده العراقيون
ليست هذه القيادات هي طموحنا بعد كل العذاب الذي رأيناه

هذه قيادات أسوأ من صدام حسين
صدام كان يرهبنا بأجهزته الامنية , لكن على الاقل لا أحد يخطف ابناءنا ولا سياراتنا ولا احد يتهجم على بيوت ا لابرياء يخطفهم أو يسفك دماءهم في الشوارع بلا سبب, كان البلد آمنا مستقرا ...
اما الان ؟
فقد عم الخراب والدمار وسفك الدماء والكذب ايضا !
فهم يقولون ان العراق تحرر , وعنده حكومة وحدة وطنية , ومستقبله مشرق وسعيد وعسل
وقت صدام كان ثمة من يبكي علينا ويواسينا
الأن , يقتلوننا ويدمرون مستقبل اولادنا , ويرسلون عنا قصص كاذبة :ان الشعب العراقي يبني دولة ديمقراطية فتية ...
ههههه, اهلا وسهلا ..
اين هي هذه الشابة الفتية؟
لا أرى سوى بلدا محطما وشعبا مفزوعا محبطا انهكته المصائب , يستغيث ويستغيث وما من مجيب....
كأن العالم كله أصابه الصمم...
****************************
في قمة الحزن والاحباط وانا في بيت صديقتي, ظهر بوش على التلفزيون في المساء , وقال : ان العالم صار افضل بعد صدام حسين ..
غرقت في الضحك..
قلت لصديقتي : اسمعي ,تره كلشي تمام , وكلشي افضل , بس احنه العراقيين منفتهم , ولا نقدر المعجزات التي جاء بها بوش للعراق...
***************************
مضى يوما الاحد والاثنين ببطء وملل , كنت أود لو استطيع الخروج من البيت والتجول في بغداد, لكنه منع التجول بسبب محاكمة صدام وتردي الحالة الامنية
نقرأ في السبتايتل على المحطات العراقية ان اهالي الاعظمية يستنجدون بالحكومة ويطلبون وقف القصف بالهاونات عليها , الحكومة تقول انها لا تعرف من اين مصدر النيران
الناس يطلبون ادوية وتبرع بالدم للضحايا ...

بعد يومين, نزلت هاونات على الكاظمية, وحي الشعب وباب المعظم , وايضا على الاعظمية,
والحكومة لا تفعل شيئا..
بعد اسبوع, وأنا في عمان , رأيت عبر شاشة احدى المحطات العراقية لقاء البرلمان مع وزير الدفاع العراقي يسألونه عن مصدر الهاونات التي تقع على الاحياء السكنية وتقتل المدنيين الابرياء, فقال انه عسكريا لا نقدر ان نحدد الموقع بالضبط لان القذائف ممكن ان تركب على سيارة بكب اب وتضرب الهدف وتتحرك
بعد مناقشات مع البرلمان قال : ليس عندنا اجهزة تكشف مصدر النيران , لكن قوات التحالف عندها ..

طيب سؤال المواطن العراقي المسكين : وما هو عملك انت وقوات التحالف المحروسة؟
الم تجلسوا على الكراسي وتستلموا السلطة تحت حجة حماية المدنيين العراقيين؟
اين هي خطط الحماية؟
ماذا فعلتم لتوقفوا نزيف الدم العراقي ؟
كل واحد يلقي المسؤولية على الاخر ويحمله اسباب الفشل ؟

زاد الحزن في قلبي على ما يحدث للعراق واهله ...
وزاد يقيني أن العراق لن ينصلح أمره, حتى تزاح هذه الاشكال المشوهة من تحمل المسؤولية
العراق بحاجة لقادة مخلصين يحققون الأمان والاستقرار للبلاد
وليس لحفنة من الخانعين الاذلاء , الذين يأتمرون بأوامر المحتل, ويعجزون عن حماية وطنهم وشعبهم .. ...
***************

Tuesday, November 14th, 2006
Peace be upon you…
I continue talking about my trip to Baghdad. It is Friday, and every Friday in Baghdad there is a curfew. People stay in their houses watching TV and listening to news. At lunch time I asked my friend; how do you manage buying your groceries, fruits and the household needs? She said- we got used to buying everything on Thursday afternoon.
The gas bottle of the cooker was empty. There were no gas vendors today. How much does changing the gas bottle cost? I asked with curiosity…
She said: 17,000 Iraqi Dinaars. I gasped…
It was 500 I.D. Two years ago.
My friend laughed and said: Oh, that was long ago, now is something else.
Very well, and the gasoline?
Now, a can of 20 liters is sold for 10,000 I.D. on the street (commercial sales, not governmental). I told her; we used to buy it for 2000 I.D. on the street two years ago.
Well, what about the salaries, have they changed? You are an employee of the state; did your salary change since two years?
She said: of course not…
I kept staring at her…
So, how do people live? No new jobs, no new projects that would create employment opportunities, and that with a job goes without a change in his salary. The private sector employers are being killed every day; merchants, company owners, and shop owners. The number of unemployment is increasing. So, how do people live? How can they spend for their families?
She looked at me, laughed, and turned her hands, as if saying: I don't know!
So, I said to her, the men have nothing available for them but to work with kidnapping and robbery gangs, and killing militias, for those would find someone to pay them fat salaries…
She shook her head, and smiled bitterly…
I smiled with her and said: Oh yes, this is the new Iraq that Bush created….
******************************
This friend of mine; the companion of my childhood and studying days, I never knew before whether she was a Sunnie or a Shia'at, ever.
I swear by Allah the Mighty that we lived long years together, until each of us got married and life separated us, then I traveled to live outside Iraq, and all the while I had no idea whatsoever of her sect.
Now, a short while ago I learned that her son's name is Omar, a Sunnie name. She fears very much for him, so she issued a second identity card for him, bearing another name, to protect him from the death gangs on roadblocks, those who kill people according to identity cards.
And that is what we reaped out of the occupation policies, and its new constitution, which is full of poison.
I am supposed to be a Shia'at, and this is my enemy- a Sunnie, according to what Bush publishes about the civil war.
Where is the hatred in my heart against her?
Where is the hatred in her heart against me?
The whole house; her husband, her son and his wife, and her daughter, all run to supply my requests, putting the best food in front of me, and they don't eat with me, shyly. They left their master bedroom to me, while she and her husband slept in another room.
I was so embarrassed by their generosity, and felt very sad for the conditions in which they live, for they do not deserve what is happening to them- the daily killings, violence, and terror.
And there is no light at the end of the dark tunnel, until now….
**************************
Saturday came on…
I was waiting for my relative to come with his car; I wanted to see my friends and neighbors…
We moved again to the 14th of Ramadan St., it was very crowded, why? I asked him.
He said: there is only one check point at the end of the street, all the side streets are closed, so traffic is compulsory through that point.
Oh well… I remained eager to see what's in that check point, my dear.

We reached the checkpoint; there was an Iraqi soldier, very slim figured, like a sparrow, about 18 or 19 years old, carrying an old Kalashnikov from the days of my grandfather. He was leaning on the concrete wall, gesturing with his hand at cars to pass.
I asked my relative: Is that it? This is the security plan for Baghdad and the check points?
He said: Ay! And what did you expect?
I said: What if we were carrying explosives? How would this kid discover us?
This is a joke!

Cars pass by, I look at faces, fearing them, and perhaps they too fear us. Horror controls the city streets and its residents… and there is nothing seriously real on the ground to improve the conditions of the Iraqi Army to become able to handle the security agenda.
*************************************
First, I went home; there were some women I knew who were coming with their children to clean the house.
I found Um Mohammed (Mohammed's mother) waiting for me. She lives in Abu Ghareeb, a poor, humble woman. She used to clean our house twice a week when I used to live in Baghdad.
I got out of the car, hugged her and cried. She cried also…
Um Raid? I cannot believe my eyes! She said, wiping her tears.
I kept laughing and crying, I don't know, my feelings were mixed. I couldn't believe I was seeing the people I loved again.
Her kids came to greet me… I was very happy. I forgot the fear.

We entered the house together; I gave them the instructions to clean.
Clean the carpets, roll them, and put them in the storage room.
Dust the furniture and cover it with cloth sheets.
Wash the small ornaments and put them in boxes.
Clean the computers and store them in boxes.

I went out to visit my brother's, then get back home again.
My sister-in-law was surprised to see me; she couldn't believe I was there!
What brought you? She said in panic.
I laughed and said: I missed Baghdad.
Are you crazy? She said, looking around her, unbelievingly…
I asked her- where is my brother?
He went to repair his car, she said…

I found her wearing black, I remembered that her sister's husband was killed shortly before; I kissed her, consoled her, and sat to listen to the details…
They stopped him at a false roadblock In Al-Add'el District. He was a Shia'at who lived there all his life. They asked for his identity card, then got him out of the car. The man disappeared, and a few days later they found his body in a Sunnie area (in Adamiyah).
Two days later, the same thing happened to his brother, who was kidnapped then his body was dropped at another area.
When we finished the burial and the funeral house, my sister decided to live in Al-Khadimiyah with her other sister. She went back again to Al-Add'el District in a taxi to get the transfer papers for her children's school. The taxi stood waiting for her in front of the school. She came out to find he was killed and his brain scattered. Someone took his identity card and read it, then killed him because he was a Shia'at. The driver's kin came forth, and accused my sister of collaborating to kill him, but she showed them the death certificate of her husband, the Shia'at, who was killed the same way, so they left her.

I remained stunned… what is this life?
And what is the meaning of all this?

I asked her: where did these criminal militias come from, who finances them? Who is the beneficiary out of their work? Is there really a sectarian civil war?
She said: do you believe these lying stories? We were dislodged from our house in Al-Ghazaliya because we are Shia'ats, and a Sunnie family, dislodged from another district, came to live in our house. We spoke with them by phone, they said they will take care of the house, and sent us some of our winter clothes. There is no hatred between the Sunnies and the Shia'ats; we were all hurt, dislodged from our houses, our men were killed on sectarian roadblocks. These sectarian militias are destroying Iraq now, killing the people, and they came with the Parties which came on board the tanks with the occupation. Those Parties are now in the government, and they do not think or work but for their own interests, protected by the occupier.
The Iraqis say that when the occupier leaves, these Parties and militias will leave with him, for then, no one will protect them. And now, as you see, the occupier is also the winner out of this mess, for it gives him a strong excuse to keep the armies, under the justification of protecting the Iraqis.
No one is protecting us, no one cares for us, everyone seeks his own interests, and the Iraqi people are the victims, and the losers.

I heard this same talk over and over from a lot of the Iraqis I spoke with all the duration of my stay in Baghdad.

There were some other women present…one of them said: Tomorrow is Saddam's trial…
I said: so what?
She said: there will be tension, a curfew, demonstrations, and mortar shells.
I kept staring, I didn't understand.
She said: they will all express their opinions, the supporters and the non-supporters…
We laughed…
I kissed my brother's wife and said good bye. I didn't see my brother; only spoke with him on the phone.
***********************
The mother of one of Majid's friends called; she is a doctor, and her husband is a university professor. I love her very much. I discovered she was a Sunnie also.
Ha, ha, ha…
All my friends and dear ones are Sunnies.
This is contradictory with Bush's terrible stories about Iraq and the war of sects.

She said: we will come to take you to the restaurant for lunch.
I asked: and is the way safe? Is the restaurant safe?
She said: by God it is a risk, but the boys have been locked in the house for a long time, and they say we want to see untie Um Majid, and have lunch with her…
I laughed, and accepted the risk.
Seeing the people I love is worth taking a risk…
So, they will come at one o'clock, noon, to take me to the restaurant.
*************
I went back home, to find it beautiful, clean and tidy. The women washed and tidied everything.
I was so happy.
I sent one of their children to buy lunch, juice and water for them. It was lunch time, and their houses were far. I gave them money, and a lot of my clothes and my sons', that were in the closets. What is the meaning of keeping these clothes in closets waiting for our return, and these poor people need them?
I said goodbye, then went to say hello to the neighbors. They received me with hugs and kisses; Oh, my dear Um Raid? How are you and the boys?
I sat with them for a while.
They complained about the bad conditions, the fear, and the daily terror.
I said to them: we hear everything, we feel for you, pray to God to ease your distress, and we do all we can to tell the world what is happening to you.
Their kids came along and gathered around me, some were drinking a can of juice, others were eating potato chips. They were laughing.
I was surprised by their innocence… I told them- I will take you a picture.
They gathered around me again, I took each picture and showed it to them, they would move closer, see the picture, burst into laughter, and then move away.
My heart laughed with them.
I envied them their innocence, for not realizing what catastrophes are happening daily around them.
Their ages weren't above five years.
They wore beautiful, colorful pajamas; yellow, pink and red. Boys and girls…
They were laughing in a way that opened my heart, and made me forget the concerns of Iraq…
I said goodbye to my neighbors, and went to the restaurant…

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